Loud, LOud, LOUd, LOUD, sssshh quiet.

When I cook, I sometimes have the TV or some music on but, generally, I prefer silence as I chop, slice and dice. I like hearing the sounds of whatever I am making come together - the hiss of the oil, the rolling bubbles of water and the clatter of pots and pans  - as I make my way around the kitchen. Usually, this is the only time I allow my self some quiet (outside of reading). It's not that I don't like quiet, I do, but I find it hard to just sit quietly and think. When I cook though, I am able to separate my brain from my actions. I know how to chop an onion, peel a carrot and crush some garlic. I do this automatically and my brain gets to think, quietly.

Hmmm this sounds as if I only think when I cook. That's not true, I think a lot - on the bus or train (when I'm not napping), snatched minutes between classes, whilst I am out for a walk or wandering around Home Plus by myself. However, I have noticed that over the years I have developed some bad habits: when I am not cooking or doing some other crafty thing, I generally don't set aside some time to meditate or just think. Instead, I use up my free time doing stupid stuff: playing on my smartphone, Imgur (seriously, whoever told me about this site, I want to take back my thanks), Facebook, TV, streaming TV or movies. None of these things are bad, of course, but like anything in excess they are not healthy for you me. 

With this in mind, over the last few months, I've been making some changes to get a little more quiet in my life. While the whole TV related thing is where it has always been, I have made strides in two areas: Facebook and my smartphone. A few months ago, I deleted FB from my phone for 4 weeks. It was tough and I didn't like it at all. I had become very reliant on the FB app so I decided to bring it back. When I did I changed my settings though. I changed them so that my phone no longer vibrates a notification or buzzes me a preview of a message. Instead, when I go into the app, I see my notifications. It's heavenly. Yes, I do sometimes miss a few messages here and there. Yes, I do sometimes check my phone obsessively every 10 minutes but these times are less and less. Instead, I only use my FB phone app on the bus and when I am at home - and not as obsessively as before!

With the freedom no longer have FB notifications gave me, I decided to extend this freedom to my other apps: Kakao especially buzzes a lot. I love this app as it keeps me very connected here in Korea.  Instagram, has also followed suit. It's amazing how much time I don't spend on my phone, now. I also turn my phone off when I enter work and turn it on again when I leave. It gives me so much more freedom to just get things done. I only have notifications for Gmail and Snapchat. Only 2 people Snapchat me so it's not too big of a deal to have it on my phone and Gmail is used for several things - from messages from my family, co-workers and projects I am involved in, so it's important that I keep those notifications!

However, despite these efforts, I still haven't found as much quiet time as I want to have in my life. Again, this is mostly my own fault. Somehow despite having between 5-6 hours every evening to be productive and get quiet time, it seems to just fly in. I don't know what is that I do, but the evening  is always over much faster than I expected. School can crawl by but the evenings fly by.  I let myself get distracted by stupid things - checking Facebook and staying on Facebook for hours, Imgur and Lamebook are total distractions (to prevent you from being distracted, I have kindly refrained from providing links) and I spend a lot of time just watching TV. It's actually good that I like to read, cook and do crafty things because if I didn't I'd totally waste my day.

For the rest of December (3.5 weeks), I am going to to make time for a little silence in each day. I don't know yet what I will do but I feel that these two things are manageable: I am going to use the quiet place everyday. It's only a few seconds (90secs). But they will be my few seconds to breathe. I am going to get outside by myself and go for a walk or a jog for a few minutes everyday. I already do this in my main school 3 days a week but I need to incorporate the other days into my life, too. 

So you might think I'm mad to waste so much of my time. You might think I'm mad to not take time to just breathe and be quiet. You might think I'm mad, considering it's snowing heavily, to want to go out everyday of the next few weeks. Well, I agree with you for one and two. I definitely need to manage my free time better. For three, well....even when it's snowing there is still value to be had in going outside and just breathing! So with a little help and prompting from myself, I think I can get a little quiet in my life! Wish me luck!

PS This post is inspired by my daily struggles to find some time to reflect and be quiet.
PPS This post is inspired by the Super Simple Song "Open, shut them" that I have used in a lot of my classes to demonstrate opposites. 

Do you see what I see?

Last week, on Saturday, my brother and I headed north to Seoul. On disembarking at Yeongdeungpo station (and after a doughnut or four) we proceeded to take the subway to Hongik university. One of the subways that we boarded (line 1, 6-2 gate, I think!!) had the most amazing carriage. I was in love from the minute I entered it. We were only on this subway for one stop, so I didn't take a picture (challenge issued by my brother) but I will do my best to describe it.

To the right of the door that we entered was a book case filled with books. One of the other passengers slipped one into his hand and proceeded to read just after we boarded the train. I kept staring at the bookcase hoping in vain that there would be something in English so I too could reach in and pull a book out to read.

To the immediate right of this was a seating area with two seats opposite each other with a little table. This was a mobile phone charging area. A second charging area was also available on the opposite side of the carriage. Right in front of both of these booths was somewhere where you could hang your umbrellas etc. It was nice day so no one was taking advantage of it - but because the bar wasn't too high, I was able to grab it instead of trying to keep my balance.

There was a water dispenser just beyond the phone charging area with those little paper cups. What I found most impressive was that it had both a cold and a HOT water dispenser - I would have thought that would be a bit dangerous on a subway as it lurches into a station!  Not only was there the water dispenser in the carriage but also a snack area was to the left of the door that we entered. I couldn't see past the snack area and there wasn't enough time for me to explore the carriage in it's entirety. There were probably many more things to see but my eyes were too greedy for what was in my immediate vicinity. Plus that book case was distracting!

So, you might think I'm mad to have not taken a picture and to have accepted my brother's challenge. You might think I'm mad to not be 100% sure of the subway I was on. However, I think the latter is unavoidable as I was too concentrated on the actual carriage to really care where I was going. For the former, something that I have learnt this past weekend is that a camera can't always capture exactly what you see and sometimes the entirety of what you are seeing is more important than the snapshot of a particular time and space that a photo captures. I still love taking photos but sometimes what my eye sees and my mind captures is even more picturesque.

Map courtesy of http://www.smrt.co.kr/program/cyberStation/main2.jsp?lang=e

PS This post is inspired by a fantastic subway ride and the song Do you hear what I hear?

I roll[ed] out of bed in the morning and [threw] on what I wanted and [went].

At 4.20am your alarm clock goes off, quickly followed by several other persistent alarms from your mobile. Groaning, you drag yourself out of bed onto the stone-cold floor as the bright fluorescent lights from the convenience store opposite softly permeate the room. Stumbling around you are incredibly glad that you planned your outfit AND set out your clothes for this morning. Once dressed, you double check the contents of your backpack: flight reservations, passport, change of clothes? All ready!You head out the door to the stillness of the night: you have finally found a quiet hour in 조치원. On  the 2nd November, this was me as I made my way from 조치원 to Seoul and then Osaka, Japan.

Fantastic poses! Photos courtesy of Katetastic.
A link to her blog is at the bottom of this page.

A few weeks ago, Katetastic and I were talking about how close Korea is to some other countries like Japan and Taiwan. We discussed maybe going there for a weekend or to Jeju which is an island off the coast of Busan, South Korea. That evening I started searching for tickets to Jeju, Japan and Taiwan. About a week after we booked our tickets (Kate, Rucy and I), my brother told me he was coming to Korea and that his visit here would overlap with our Japan trip: three became four. Our flight was at 10.25 from Seoul Incheon airport, hence the early start and we arrived in Osaka a little after noon. It took a little while to get to Osaka itself as we grabbed convenience store food and then, inadvertently, stood in the wrong line for a good 30-45 minutes before Rucy figured out our mistake and went to check if we could take a different train. The train journey itself was smooth and uneventful - except that during it, Rucy managed to perfect the Korean technique of falling asleep and only waking just as they announce your arrival at your station. When I take subway or train naps, I knock out! If it wasn't for my alarm, I would find myself in Busan on many occasions!

After dropping our stuff at the hostel and discovering nearly everything we wanted to do that day closed at 4, we proceeded to the Ebisucho subway area to see the Tsūtenkaku tower. Initially impressive looking, the tower itself was a bit disappointing. We found ourselves underneath a quite diminutive tower with a 45 minute wait. However, the street from the subway station to the tower was lit up and filled with interesting shops. So instead, we wandered around the area taking in the lights, colours and smells of Osaka. Sadly, this was quickly done and we found ourselves at a lost of what do do until 8 when we were meeting our friends who lived in Osaka. During our wait, we discovered one big difference between Japan and Korea: WIFI. I never realised just how prevalent it is and how much I appreciate it when I am in Korea until we had no access in Japan and couldn't change our meeting place or times. I don't mind not having WIFI but when you expect it, it is definitely a bummer to not have it!

On meeting our friends, we proceeded to our second tourist spot of the evening: Dotonbori. This place was light filled, hip and a clash of Western and Japanese stores. There were plenty of places to eat and tons of things to look at - from cosplay girls to interesting shops and fascinating buildings. We visited the iconic billboard and ate Okonomiyaki, Osaka's best known dish. It is cooked on a grill in the middle of the table. However, unlike Korean grills it is one flat sheet. It reminded me more of the Mongolian Grill I went to in Council Bluffs many years ago. This dish is considered a Japanese pancake. Like Kimchijeon, it is a savoury pancake and it very tasty. This is the third Asian country I have been where they have a food that is like a savoury pancake but that has it's own unique twist (Vietnamese Banh Xeo).

Takoyaki - Photo courtesy of Katetastic.
See below for link to her blog*.

The most impressive sight that we saw was Osaka castle. The grounds were spectacular and even from outside the castle it made for interesting viewing with its deep moat and high, unscalable walls. It reminded me of the view of Edinburgh Castle when it is viewed from Prince's street! When we were there two guys came over to invite us to some show that they were doing that night. We weren't able to go but we got a photo with them nevertheless. While I found the exhibition in the castle a little disappointing (I think I was expecting what you'd see in Edinburgh Castle!), it was still interesting and the grounds more than made up for it, especially since we got to try Takoyaki - which again was popularised in Osaka.

So, you might think I'm mad to go to Japan for one night. You might think I'm mad to eat octopus considering I really don't like seafood and you might think I'm mad to consider going on another weekend trip. Well, I kind of think that I am mad too! I am exhausted. I don't think I've been so tired in an age. However, I also know that my lack of recovery from this trip is not really due to having gone to Japan but having had to get up really early and having had some sort of Saturday school every weekend for the last few weeks and next coming weeks. That is what tires me out and makes me non-functional for a week! Or at least that's what I prefer to believe - the other option is that I am getting old and travel tires me out. NEVER!

PS. This post was inspired by my trip to Japan and by Beyonce's If I were a boy. 

PPS: Katetastic's blog can be found here. It's a fantastic one, so read away! Thanks, Kate for letting me use your pictures!

Hello, is it me you're looking for?

I have a friend, Katetastic, who like me is a little older than the main TEFL teacher demographic and, perhaps, this is why when we are together we talk the way we do. I think if anyone had been able to earwig on a recent conversation they'd have been a little shocked by the subject. Our conversation was about pleasures in life and how Westerners, overall, appear to be better at enjoying pleasure than Koreans.

Due to Korea's fast paced lifestyle and work, work, work attitude (as a student or an employee), I think that Koreans have lost some of their ability to enjoy life. Everywhere you go people have their noses in their smartphones, even in coffee shops with friends (guilty as charged). They never turn off or ignore their phones. As a teacher, I know how much time my students spend each day in school with many students attend school from 8.30 in the morning to the same time at night! Very little time is given to them to play. The constant focus on working or studying deprives these younger generations of the value of social interactions and pleasurable activities, whether you do them alone or in groups. Instead to compensate for their hard work, parents present their children with the latest state of the art smartphone as these can help them in their studies and provide some relief to the intensity of the day. I have students who are in 1st Grade (FIRST GRADE) with Smartphones! My first smart phone was at the grand old age of 29. I didn't own a mobile phone until I was in my 2nd year of college and I was 21 at that stage! Granted this was eons ago but it doesn't take away the impact that a mobile phone has on your interpersonal communication skills and behaviour.

As a Speech Communication major this fascinates, and to be honest, kind of appalls me. With all that mobile phones can do, thanks to their many wonderful apps, it sometimes seems as if they've changed communication forever more.

Graduating as a Speech Comm. Major

We seem to interact more with our mobiles than we do our fellow humans. However, if we look at the Shannon-Weaver Model of Communication, we can see that communication  really hasn't really changed. Instead of a human receiver we have an electronic one. These devices can even provide us with feedback!  There are benefits to this, of course: responses to our requests for information are fed back to us is immediately.  We can get a plethora of information on any subject we desire. Airline, concert and train tickets can be booked ahead of time. Without needing a computer, never mind a printout, we can board trains, enter cinemas and even go to restaurants. Music can be listened to and your favourite movies or tv shows are all easily accessible.

 Shannon -Weaver Model - image courtesy of Uri.edu

Even with all the benefits, I would argue that allowing a device to become the sole receiver of a message, we will cause problems in our interpersonal relationships. I would argue that the device has become the noise rather than the channel that feeds the message. As a technology savvy country, Korea encourages it's consumers to buy the latest gadgets and, as everyone uses their mobile phones all the time, most Koreans own the latest iPhone or Samsung Galaxy. Thanks to cheap internet rates and the multitude of PC Bangs (internet cafes), the majority of the country spends an awful lot of time on the internet or playing online games. With having a phone that gives notifications everytime a message is received, whether it is a text or a notification from a social website such as Facebook, you are looking at constant interruptions to your social interactions. Even if the message isn't checked immediately, it has caused an interruption. Many apps, such as Kakao, allow a preview of the message to appear on your locked screen, even when the phone is on silent.  This means that even without sound, the flash of the incoming message can distract from conversations as, invariably, you glance down to see who it's from. This leads to you losing focus on the person you are interacting with and your conversation.

With the increasing reliance on devices, Koreans are getting more and more used to instant gratification as pretty much everything that they want is on their phone and any information that they need is instantly sent back to them. I believe that this has caused an expectation of instant gratification in their daily lives - waiting on a message from a friend, public transport, waiting to be served in a the local shop etc. Not only can it cause frustration in how they interact when forced to have delays but it can also detrimentally affect how they interact as there seems to be an innate need to respond to your friends and colleagues instantly without taking time to think of your response. For example, I was asked in September whether or not I plan on staying another year in Korea - 9 full months before my contract ends. I was expected to give an answer right away for something I haven't made a decision on or thought very much about. Thankfully, my co-teacher also thought that I should wait a few months longer to make a decision.

Another way that the push to constantly use your phone is encouraged, is the culture of using public transport in Korea. While people do talk on the subway/bus and train, it is generally in very hushed tones. Those that talk in normal decibels are frequently hushed (yours truly included).  I've sat beside Koreans having full blown conversations on their phone and I haven't been able to hear a word that they said. This means that even friends or family members easily spend the entire ride in utter silence. Instead, they have their noses in their phones or pass the time by sleeping rather than talking.

On my Samsung Galaxy, I not only have the phone's camera but a silent camera, Instagram, Snapchat and several collage makers. I can instantly snap photos at any time that I want. Each app caters to a specific need - the silent camera is great for those sneaky pictures, Snapchat for those funny messages between friends and Instagram for stunning sunsets. Even more important in Korea, is the mandatory selfie. While I have on many occasions have been guilty of attempting and perfecting the selfie, I recognise that it has actually affected my interpersonal relationships. Selfies encourage us to go it alone and, as Elsie Hu said in this NPR article, "The cultural shift is complete. We're all just alone with our smartphones, even when we are surrounded by other humans." Rather than ask someone to take a photo of me standing beside a monument, I will take a picture of myself with only the slightest glimpse of the monument in the background. So instead of having a moment to remember pleasurably, I have a picture of me with the hint of something in the background. When I show those photos to someone else will I be able to remember what that something was and what my feeling were on seeing it?

Recent Selfies

While many things on a smartphone contribute to our entertainment, I don't believe that they necessarily contribute to pleasure in life. The constant interruptions, the intense focus on the phone and the perceived inability to turn it off, has, I believe, negatively impacted Korean's growth in social interactions and pleasure. Korea has grown so much in the last 50 years and as a result they have had to juxtapose traditional values and ways of life against the intense growth in technology, wealth, educational demands and the pressure that is associated with these.

So you might think I'm mad to believe that Korea is somewhat negatively impacted by the strides it has made in becoming a first world country.  You might think I'm mad to believe that the negative impact is directly related to a loss of pleasure and relaxation as well as basic interpersonal skills. You might think I'm mad to frown upon the instant gratification of smart-phones and to even consider them the noise in the Shannon and Weaver model. However, I urge you to think how often you use your mobile phone and what impact it has on your relationships. While I believe that the West is better at having pleasure in our lives, we are increasingly allowing technology to take over. Do I think that smartphones only negatively impact Korea? Definitely not, but until I came to Korea and experienced the abundance of dependence on a device, I never thought of the negative connotations of having a smartphone. One only needs to look at the episode of the Big Bang Theory where Raj falls in love with the Siri app on his iPhone to see how easy it is for anyone, not just Koreans, to become obsessed with their smartphone and to allow it dictate our life.

There is so much to talk about in relation to this subject alone but as this is starting to become an essay and not a blog post I will stop here! Before I stop a huge shout out to my friend, Panama, for all his help and tips for this post, and to my sister, KT, for all her help in reviewing and rewriting this post. Remaining mistakes are all my own!

PS - this post is inspired by a conversation with Katetastic and my dwelling on my one of my favourite college courses - Communication Theory. Further, the title of this post was inspired by Lionel Ritchies' "Hello".
For more information on the Shannon and Weaver Communication Model, please click here. Em Griffin actually wrote the book that I used in college for Communication Theory. He's a legend and (lucky me) he autographed my copy of this book! The image of the model above was taken from Uri.edu.

PPS - this post places Korea in a negative light. I want to point out that I know several Koreans who defy the above observations. However, this does not detract from the truth of these general observations on Korea's modern culture and communication style.

PPPS - there is a new watch being unveiled by Samsung and I think that this is, possibly, just another nail in the interpersonal communication coffin of South Korea!