We can share the myths, the dream, the prayer, The notion that we can do better

2015. Well, unlike a few years ago when I first started this blog, I'm way more passionate about resolutions. I've been reading a lot of blogs about minimalism, being healthy, getting your life in order, etc. As I tend to be a bit of a chaotic soul, I need some curtailment in my life! I want to improve my mind, my body, my soul this next year. These are my overall goals for the year. I will also add to this at different points in the year and I want to review this every month. For example, at the bottom of this page, I will list my goals in January. In February, I will review where I am on January's goals and revise as needed. My time in Korea is coming to an end and here are some of my goals and resolutions for the next year, in no particular order:

Goals

1. Take a cooking class in Korea.
2. Take a cooking class in Laos (I am going there for vacation in February).
3. Take a cooking class in Ireland.
4. Get some knife lessons. I could definitely use a brush up and lots of tips! 
5. Try Speed Dating.
6. Sign up and complete the CELTA.
7. Get training to be an Adult Literacy Tutor.
8. Organise a fundraiser for the House of Sharing.
9. Do the Camino.
10. Get my hair to a satisfactory healthy level.

Resolutions

1. Read more. (I want to get to the healthy level of at least 2 books a week.)
2. Write more on this blog.
3. Cook more for my cooking blog and Sejong Dish.
4. Waste less food.
5. Spend less money in Homeplus (I have a severe weakness!)
6. Walk more.
7. Draw more.
8. Go on more dates with myself.
9. Wake up at 6.00 every day including weekends. At least once go outside to the roof to watch the sunrise. This one is hard but I'd like it to be achieved before I leave Korea. It will also help for the Camino in September. 
10. Find a volunteer activity that I am passionate about. I have volunteered for different things over the years but I've never really found something I was 100% passionate about. I loved all the opportunities I have had but I never found the right fit for my time, energy and passion. Here's to some new opportunities.
11. Drink more tea
12. Take time to hangout more with my friends in Korea (and at home).
13. Cook for my friends more often.
14. Less TV/Computer/Phone time in the evenings. Try to turn it off at least 30 minutes before bed.
15. Save money so that I'm not completely financially dependent on my family when I go home. 
16. Keep in better contact with my friends in other countries (SKYPE dates!). 
17. Go to bed earlier. Basically, get more sleep.
18. Make my bed everyday. I hate this exercise but it's a good one to get into the habit of doing!

January 2015

• Organise two dates for when I am on vacation and complete them.
• Make bed everyday
• Read more

PS Title from this post is taken from Tracy Chapman's "New Beginning"

You only get one shot, do not miss your chance to blow, this opportunity comes once in a lifetime

So, I've been bad lately! I've let other projects take over my personal writing. This would have been okay had it only lasted a couple of weeks but it's been much longer as you, dear readers, know.

So what is it that I've been up to that caused me to slack off on something I really love? Well, I started a new blog - a cooking one back in April. I actually started working on it in January but I wasn't really happy with it for a long while, hence the launch date of April! It's taken up a lot of my time - testing, re-testing, writing, editing, publishing. I really love it though as it balances two of my favourite things - cooking and writing. I've also been busy with the SejongDish where I write another cooking blog as well as restaurant reviews and answering FAQs. Between these two writing projects my personal blog has taken a backseat. However, this post is to tell you that I am changing that.

Even though I have a few posts in the making (the long promised part 2 of my Wand'rin' Star trilogy of photo posts, to name one), I haven't been able to finish them yet. They are mostlyphoto posts and, even though some of my photos are pure awful, it's really hard to pick the best ones to showcase my town and the different areas I've visited in Korea. I will get them done at some stage - but I hope I'm not still saying that this time next year!

Anyway, I digress, the reason for this post is to share with you some changes I am making in my life. I am overweight, I am lazy and I sometimes fail miserably at eating healthily. This laziness has taken over my life and despite the other projects detailed above, the main reason I haven't written is due to this actual and very real problem. So how am I trying to tackle that problem, well read on:

Since May, I've been making and bringing my own lunches to school three times a week. I've done pretty well on those and even on my laziest days (saltine crackers and whole cherrytomatoes), I still eat plenty of vegetables. However, I've a huge sweet tooth. I've always had one but it's gotten much worse in Korea, which is odd as we definitely have better chocolate at home! I tend to have a stack of candy for my students and I often find myself munching them. Lately, I've been actively trying to make sure I don't reach for that bag as I know when I do I won't just eat one. I sometimes forget and I've stuffed 10 Hershey Kisses down my throat before I've realised what happened but mostly, I do remember and put them back.

Another change I've made which is the main one I'm going to be sharing with you, is to try and watch less television. The television itself isn't the problem, the way I watch it is. Usually, as soon as I walk in the door, the tv goes on and I flop on the bed. After an hour or so I make dinner, maybe read or do some lesson planning but usually I go back to watching tv. And, then, I bemoan the fact that the day got away from me. Really? Really? Really? Where do I think it went? Humm in a cloud of smoke known as The Good Wife or some other drama (that TV show is my latest obsession). I've tried tackling it a few times this year but I never succeeded. Recently my friend, Jamie, posted this article on Facebook and it really made me reflect on my life and my habits. So many things I love doing have been sacrified for a TV show: Going on walks, cooking (less so because of my blog but until I was working on that this was definitely true), reading, writing, drawing, hanging out, and calling home to name but a few.

Since last Friday, I try to spend the first hour home, or after work, away from the TV and watching TV on my computer and being on Facebook/Gmail etc unless it's blog related. So let's see how I did, shall we:

Friday June 27th: Ate dinner with my friend Katetastic, delicious bibimbap and kimchi. I then headed up to my rooftop armed with a water bottle, sketchbook, pencil, eraser and parer. I was up there around 20 minutes when my friend, Jules, asked me to go on a walk. I'd a Skype date lined up with my Mam for her birthday in one hour from then, but a walk sounded divine, so off we went. Friday = Success!

Monday, June 30th: I had soaked some cashews the night before and whilst at work, so I threw some small potatoes into the oven to bake and proceeded to make cashew cheese. It took me nearly the whole hour to do so as I don't own a food processer, so I'd to mash them, then mash them through a strainer and then, finally, blend them with a stick blender. It was hard work but a lot of fun, and whilst the cheese was "lacking" something I'm excited to try it again. With the time I'd left, I ate my dinner and set up for tea night. The picture below is of my cashew cheese! Monday = Success.

Tuesday, July 1st: I was really lucky today, I got out of school right on time, got a lift to the bus stop where I got a bus right away so it meant I was actually at home by 5.30. This NEVER happens for my Tuesday/Friday school, unlesss I get a (very rare) lift home. With all this extra time, I got so excited I bought an ice-cream (it was really hot) and turned my TV on as soon as I got home. I realised my mistake about 20 minutes in, turned it off, made dinner (potatoes and cashew cheese again) and then worked on 3 games for Wednesday classes to review in preparation for the exams next week. Tuesday = half Failure, half Success.

Wednesday, July 2nd: I went to Yoga after work at the Lake Park and then to eat dinner with my friend Annette (bibimbap is a necessity in my life!). I didn't actually walk in the door until after 8 (except to drop off my bags before dinner) so when I did get in, I did some dishes and turned on the TV. Wednesday = Success.

Thursday, July 3rd: I came home, realised that nearly everything in my fridge was expiring (and the spinach had expired) so cooked up an unsuccesful dish taste wise. While all the ingredients SHOULD have worked together they just didn't. Boo! In between cooking and chopping (remember I only have a one-ring stove), I cleaned my apartment in anticipation of Liz coming over to make some Nepalese Chiah (Nepalese tea). Thursday = Success.

So week 1 went well, didn't it? What I really liked was how much time an hour is. I don't think I realised how much time I have in an hour until I couldn't distract my self with TV. I have decided to try again this next week, starting with July 4th but leaving out the weekends. I liked being able to go up and draw, to get many things done all at the same time and to spend some valuable time experimenting in the kitchen. I really like the opportunities it affords.

What I didn't like was how easy it is to turn on the TV if the switches are already on. I didn't like having to clean but it IS practical to use the time. For next week, cooking included, I want to try and use this hour for projects like blogging, drawing, reading or for activities like meeting friends for tea, going for a walk, rather than any cleaning.

I don't think you will find me mad at all with this new opporunity. You only get one life to liveand we really shouldn't "blow" this one life. I can't stand, hand on heart,and not say that I am part of my problem. I need to seize the day and the responsibilty for how my actions affect my life. I figured the best way to do that is to share these little journeys with you. I want to do it for a month initially but hopefully for longer.

Until next time folks!

PS this post was inspired by Eminem's "One shot"

[I got] this party started on a [Friday] night

With E on Valentines at Exit.

At a cafe with M and A

Back in January after my first date with myself, I wrote down a series of days I could set aside for myself up until July. However, life has a way of interrupting the best laid plans of mice and Maggie. I had wanted to do something for Valentine's weekend but when that weekend rolled up, I'd several dates with friends. Valentines was spent at Hongdae Park and Exit Bar near Hongik University in Seoul. A friend was DJ-ing so we danced the night away. The following day I met up with some other friends in Hongdae for a falafel dinner, cake and coffee (and in my case a glass of wine!). Needless to say, when you are having so much fun with friends, a date with yourself is the last thing on your mind. However, I was up in Seoul again two weekends later to say goodbye to some very dear friends, E and D, and a huge welcome to a friend, CG, who is newly arrived from Ireland. I decided that I'd go up Friday and get plenty of sleep so that I could party the night away on Saturday.

On that Wednesday, my co-teacher told me that the principal had decided that I could have Thursday and Friday off to spend how I wanted. I already had plans for Thursday evening with the same co-teacher so I decided I'd head up around noon on Friday afternoon, check-in and then head on my date to an art museum or a palace for the day. Sadly, I wasn't prepared to leave by noon but eventually, I made my way to Seoul. At this point, I'd decided to not bother with the date and to just while away the time reading my book, eating dinner and sleeping. However, I realised that the department store I was eating in had a cinema. One of my aims with "dating myself" is to do things that I am nervous to do alone or at all. Going to the cinema by myself ranked high on that list!

Caramel popcorn

Cinema ticket!

My ugly jumper on date night

So, despite the fact that I was in sweatpants and a jumper, I decided to "get over myself" and courageously went up the escalator. Thankfully, there weren't many people in the foyer and I bought my ticket  to Non-stop with Liam Neeson (swoon!) with ease. Loaded up with a concealed bottle of water (I'm cheap, don't ya know?) and a visible bag of caramel popcorn, I passed my ticket over and made my way to screen one. I have to admit that I enjoy going to the cinema with friends/family more than going by myself. I love the inevitable chat afterwards, the sharing of the treats (seriously, I ate an entire bag of popcorn by myself) and, if a moment is crazy, weepy or hilarious, having someone you can share it with.  That being said, it wasn't as bad as I thought it would be. You do feel judged and perhaps it is worse in Korea than in Ireland. Everyone was there either as a couple or in groups of friends. I was, literally, the only person by myself, sitting on the edge of an row. I forgot myself at a few points and went to grab my neighbour's arm. Thankfully, I restrained myself in time: I don't think his girlfriend would have been too pleased!

Big Bread, Sinchon (exit 3)

On Saturday, I knew I'd be busy from

 the afternoon onwards saying goodbye to E and D, so I decided that I'd use the morning for the rest of my impromptu date. I got up early and headed over to Sinchon to eat at a restaurant I'd read some reviews on. When I arrived (it was a little after 11, I think), I made my way downstairs and walked into Big Bread. I was the only customer. It freaked me out enough that I seriously considered turning around and finding a coffee shop. Whilst eating alone is not so intimidating any more, eating alone in a restaurant as the sole customer is. The restaurant was large enough to make me feel like an ant at a picnic. Consequently, although I was ready to eat after two minutes of perusing the menu, I was hesitant to press the bell to call the waitress. Instead I waited until I could wave her over. Whilst, I do think the bell is a wonderful invention, there is something very demanding about using it when you are the only one there!

(City hall, exit  2)

 A veggie sandwich and a cup of tea later, I decided to head to Deoksugung and attend the exhibition of Masterpieces of Modern Korean Painting.  My favourites were A deep valley by Noh Soohyeon, Autumn by Kim Kichang, The gate of youth by Chun Kyungju and Han Mook's Spiral Blue. This exhibition was quite busy as many families and couples were taking the Saturday morning to view the exhibit. I love taking my time at museums so I found the pace a little off-putting and I got quite a few stares when I lingered overly long at the above paintings. As this museum is in the grounds of the palace and the weather was delightful, I spent about another 30-40 minutes wandering around the palace grounds afterwards. I have visited this palace many times, though, so after a while, I decided to make my way back to my hostel and friends with a stop off for hot chocolate and cake. 

Cocobruni Earl Grey Cake

So, you might think I'm mad to have gone to an exhibit at a busy time considering I prefer my art and history in moments of quiet. Seriously, though had I known how busy it was going to be, I probably wouldn't have gone and I would have, possibly, missed out on a really nice exhibit. You might think I'm mad to go to the cinema by myself. This one I can totally understand and I even agree with! When I told some friends of my adventure, most of the girls told me they'd never done it either. Despite the fact that you sit in a dark room to watch a flickering screen, going to the cinema is such a social event. It wasn't easy for me to go up and order that ticket or to walk in alone. Luckily, once those lights go down everyone is concentrating on the screen and no one is even thinking about you.  So next time your want to see a movie that causes your boyfriend/girlfriend to roll his/her eyes in despair, remember you can take head on out with a big bag of popcorn and enjoy the movie without him/her!

PS This post was inspired by my second impromptu date and P!nk's song " Let's get this party started!"

With CG & D at Thursday Party

With CG & E at Thursday Party

PPS A huge shout-out to my friends E and; D - they are the people I visited Seoul so often for in the last 1.75 years and I will miss them terribly. E especially has been so kind, and I am so grateful to my brother for sharing his friends with me. And to CG - I look forward to sharing many adventures with you over this next year!

There was an old lady who swallowed her fly

Do you ever get in your head that you want a particular book for yourself or as a gift? Has it ever happened that because of that, despite the fact the bookshop has millions of books you feel as if there is nothing there? Welcome to my world!

I'll be honest, this usually doesn't happen to me. Mostly, if I don't find a particular book that I am looking for, I spend hours wandering around looking for a substitute.  Sometimes, I will even change the genre completely. I've gone from searching for a Wilkie Collins to buying a Tintin. So, this winter, when I was in my favourite Irish bookshop (Chapters, for those in the know), I was alarmed to find myself becoming increasingly irritable in a bookshop. I mean, how is that even possible? I've spent entire Saturday afternoons in bookshops, never bought anything and still went home happy! I went to my next favourite bookshop (Easons) and again was getting more and more annoyed. I couldn't find a book that I was looking for or a substitute that I liked.

What was this infamous book? A first edition of a lost masterpiece? No. The newest Lee Child (Jack Reacher novels)? No.  50 Shades of Grey?  Not in a million years.  No, it was something much more elusive -  a book version of There was an old lady who swallowed a fly. We had a great copy when I was a kid and I wanted to share something with my nephew that was fun and catchy. My plan was that we would each have a copy of the book, so that when we have our Skype story time we both have a book to look at. I spent over an hour just looking by myself for the book in both the new and second hand sections. When this failed, I asked for help, and sadly that book hadn't been in stock for years. I didn't have time to order it as I was flying out that same week. So I began to comb the shelves to find a substitute. However, all the books that I looked at evaded my interest - the pictures were unattractive to me, the content either too wordy or barely any words and several stories uninspiring. In Easons, it was the same story and I was so frustrated with it that I decided to give up matching story books. I wanted these books because I don't own any children's books in Korea.When I have read to him in the past, I've had to bring books home from school and sometimes I didn't know I was going to get to talk to him that day so I didn't have a book. He wasn't impressed either with the stories I made up!

Eventually, thanks to one of my other sisters I got Chicken Licken and The Enormous Turnip. My nephew has his copy that he can follow along with at home, and I have my copy here in Korea. We tested it out a couple of weeks ago, and besides one or the other of us turning the pages too fast this went really well. This love of being read to doesn't stop at Skype. When I was home, he was read to by everyone! He loves kids stories, comics like Asterix and even factual books about trains and animals. His train one is a firm favourite. I think, in one day, I read it 3 times and his Mam easily double that! Whilst I was home, he got to go on the Luas (a modern tram) and a train to and from Athlone. I think he thoroughly enjoyed both trips as he was full of questions and chat about both modes of transportation. On the train, pulling into each station the announcer would say "Mind the gap" and by the end of the day, he was mimicking the phrase. He'll probably die of happiness whenever he is on the London Tube and hears the exact same expression. You might think I'm mad to believe that a negative experience in a bookshop is something that I am now glad has happened. You see, I realised that I had to "swallow my fly" to be able to find what I was looking for. Until I had put aside the absolute NEED for that particular book, I wasn't able to see the potential in all the other books. However, once I could the possibilities were endless.

Reading to my nephew has a few distinct advantages over reading to my students. While he may not know all the words, I rarely need to explain anything to him. Another distinct advantage is he asks questions for what he doesn't understand. I hope that someday, my students will have fostered their independence in English enough to have the courage to question everything.  I know sometimes my students have questions but they don't have the vocabulary to make the question. And as annoying as "But, why?" can be, I wish for nothing more than to hear those two words frequently from my nephew and eventually from my students. But, why? Well, it shows their inquisitiveness and investment in the story they are being read. It challenges me to find the answers to give them. To expand their thinking, to encourage their love of the story and their desire to know everything. For my students, it will help them to build their confidence in English and in their abilities.

Digging a hole with a stick

As you can probably tell, except for the one frustrating day in bookshops (still shocked that could happen!), I had a wonderful trip home. Some highlights for me included seeing some friends, having Afternoon Tea at the Gresham Hotel, my niece's christening and getting to see most of my relatives, and just hanging out with my sweet, sweet niece, wonderful nephew and amazing siblings, brother-in-law and parents.You might think I'm mad to be quite happy to just sit at home and giggle at a baby's smiles. You might think I'm mad to be happy with a short and busy two weeks in rainy, cold Ireland instead of a warm beach in Bali. Well, I thought I was mad at first to go home again so soon after my last visit in August. However, even the lure of a beach couldn't drag me from meeting my new niece. So, considering how much I enjoyed both these trips home you might really think I'm mad to have decided that, should I stay in Korea a third year, I will not visit home again until the end of that contract. It was a tough decision to make but I decided to follow my initial goal for living in Korea, outside of teaching: to travel and see the world.

At the museum

Baba!

PS. This post was inspired by my trip home, a negative experience and a favourite childhood book: There was an old lady who swallowed a fly.

PPS. I've bought us each a copy of that elusive book! It's his birthday present!

Family

So while I’m still healing

I'm not a huge New Year's Eve person. I don't remember the last time I truly enjoyed it in years. Ok, I do. It was my first year back in Ireland after college. My sister's friend MK came up for a visit and we stayed up watching Surviving Christmas and, I think, a Take That performance. We were dragged outside to greet the new year and then rushed back in for sausages and egg-flip. We stayed up late and, eventually, one-by-one crawled our way up the stairs and into bed. My younger brother and sister remained downstairs as they decided that they'd clean up so our Mam wouldn't have a heart attack first thing in the new year (yes, we were that messy). The next thing I knew my dad was shouting for us all to get up and come downstairs as there was a grand surprise in the kitchen. I remember grumbling and complaining that it was probably just one of the neighbours. I was so annoyed that my sleep had been disturbed (it was 9.am!!!) and so I reluctantly pulled on a jumper, scrambled for socks and shoes and made my way down stairs. A screech of excitement poured out of me and the rest of my siblings: My aunt from America was in town! She hadn't told my mam that she was coming and only the two dotes who had stayed up cleaning knew about it. We spent the day chatting, eating and, at some point, in Cineworld watching Happy Feet while my aunt passed out next to us. It was a marvellous  new year as was the one following that (wow,  this is not going well for my post about not liking New Year's!) as another aunt and a cousin visited us from America. My Aunt stayed with us on New Year's eve and we spent the evening drinking, singing, playing games and just having a good time. I think we all stayed up, parents and aunt included, until at least 2 or 3 in the morning.

Most of my New Year's Eves, however, have felt like a let down. There is this huge build up to what amounts to not very much. Maybe I'm a cynic and maybe I've been alone too long but I feel that, much like Valentine's day, New Year's is a couple's holiday and there is a stench of desperation in the air when you are single. "Oh, you're single? What are you going to do for Valentine's/New Year's?" "Oh, who are you going to kiss when it's midnight?" Seriously, who cares?  I'm fine with the fact that I am single and alone on New Year's. It honestly doesn't bother me very much. Do I wish I had someone? Of course, I do...but not for the sole express reason of New Year's Eve. I don't want someone just for one night. I want someone for a long time. Hopefully, someday, forever (the single, independent me got shivers typing that!).  I don't need anyone to make my life complete right now. I'm happy being me and living these experiences. Yes, I want other experiences like marriage, a husband and kids. But, I'm (mostly) ok with the fact that it hasn't happened yet.

There's a point to this story, dear readers, and to this rant, so please bear with me a little longer. Katetastic recently helped Swaglu plan a date for herself. Swaglu went on a date by herself with herself. My mind boggled. What the feck? Seriously? What.....?  However, the more I thought about it and started to reflect on my hang-ups and the things that bother me about dating, the more the idea appealed to me. For example, at the moment dating someone seems like a chore - I don't want to have to consider anyone else in my plans. If I want to go up on a Saturday morning to Seoul, I don't want to feel that I have to invite someone else. I know I'll feel different about it when  I do have a boyfriend or husband but in the meantime, I don't think I'm ready for this step yet. I am having hard enough of a time trying to figure me out without adding someone else to the mix. On the other hand if someone were to ask me out, I (probably) wouldn't say no.

Breakfast and a book

To that end, Swaglu's date with herself inspired me. The weekend that I celebrated my birthday, I decided I wanted to go on a date with myself. I didn't know exactly what to do so I researched.
 I knew it should be something that I wanted to do so I decide to do some reading, eating, writing and cooking. I also wanted to factor in some reflection time and some fresh air. It's getting to be time to decide on whether or not I will stay in Korea, and, unlike last year, I have no real clue as to what I want to do. Taking myself on a date sounded like a good option. I decided that I would get up early so I could enjoy as much of the day as possible and I would dress up using mascara, jewelry and heeled boots. And, unlike normal I decided that I wouldn't plan too much. I had vague ideas of what I wanted to accomplish and the only solid thing I had decided on was that I would read Waris Dirie's Desert Flower.

On New Year's Eve, some friends and I had arranged to go to Noraebang (singing room) and whilst waiting for everyone to be free, I decided to take my book and read at the local coffee shop. Shortly after sitting down, I decided I wanted to start my date early and had started to text my friend to tell her. Before I could send the text she walked in, dressed all sparkly and ready to sing. And it hit me. Yes, my date is all about me. And despite having the voice of a crow, I love to sing. So off we went for a fun time! Sometime around 1, after a tipsy call home to say "Happy New Year", I flopped into bed. 

When morning arrived, I got up around 9.20 and began what would end up being the most relaxing day I ever remember having. I'm one of those people who usually needs about 50 alarms to wake up every morning. I set one and I paid attention to it. I spent my day reading and eating, walking and thinking. It was a perfect day for a winter date. The sky was fairly clear and, instead of bitter cold, the air was quite warm and pleasant. While I did things that I enjoy - walking in the sunshine, drinking tea and reading.  I also did something that challenged me: I ate alone in a restaurant and I enjoyed it. There is something about coffee shops and eating a muffin alone that are just fun but eating in a restaurant alone unnerves me. I've done it plenty of times, but always involuntarily. It's just one of those things that I don't like to do. So when I planned my date, I decided that I was going to enjoy a meal by myself in a public setting. 

The Memorial park I walked to

Nom Nom Nom

I picked one of my favourite restaurants here in Korea, Mt Fishtail in Cheonan, which has delicious Indian food and I set off. I arrived and was seated in a both next to 4 men. A little unnerved at the idea of facing them the whole time, I sat with my back facing them and had a great time. I spent some time thinking of what I want from life. I then read a book on my phone because I had accidentally left my second book for the day laying on my bed. I took a long time to eat - over an hour  -and I just enjoyed the time that I had.

Tea time!

Afterwards, I decided to go for a walk around the town thinking that I could tackle a second thing that I don't like doing by myself: going to the cinema. As I made my way up the several escalators, I was giving myself several mental claps on the back for being brave. And then, I go upstairs. The Hobbit wasn't on, and since I truly wasn't really enamoured with the idea of going to the cinema by myself, I decided it was time for home. Although, had The Hobbit been on, I think I could have done it and enjoyed it! Unfortunately getting out of the cinema proved difficult as I spent 15-20 minutes wandering around trying to find the exit. I even took a lift (elevator), which is not something I embark on lightly, to the 1st floor only to have to go down tons of escalators because I somehow managed to get up 5 floors ABOVE where I had been. Eventually, I found the exit and proceed home for more tea and relaxation.

You might think I'm mad to go on a date with myself. You might think I'm mad to be scared of eating alone and of elevators. Well, let's address elevators first - I've been stuck twice in them and had to be let out both times. So that is a reasonable fear. I have been in them plenty of times but I don't like being in them. Regarding the eating alone. I personally think it's ironic that for someone who enjoys food as much as I do that I don't like this activity but then I think of what a meal means to me: It means sitting around the table with my family, people jostling for the best seats and the biggest plate. It means conversations and laughter, ribbing and memories. However, as I discovered on New Year's day - eating alone has value too. I just need to channel my alone-ness better. As for dating myself, it isn't because I don't want to date someone in reality, it's because I need to get to know me better. I need to look at what changes and challenges I want to face in my life. There are things that have been on my list for years like eating alone and going to the cinema by myself that I have never gotten around too.

I have decided that I am going to commit to 11 more dates this year and for each of them I am going to do something that challenges me. February's date will be about going to the cinema alone. I don't know what the rest will be yet, but I hope that this challenge/resolution has a lot of value for me as a person who wants to grow and be the best version of herself that she can be. For someone who wants to get married and have a family someday, that I can be ready for the things that will scare me then. Like getting married and having children. When I was younger I was fearless but somewhere between the last year of college and now, I lost my courage and my freedom. I became shy and scared. It doesn't matter why it happened, it matters that it did and the only way I can get some of my freedom back is to challenge myself. So while I am challenging myself to find some healing and courage, "just try and have a little patience".

PS. This post was inspired by my New Year's day, some great memories and some great people. It was also inspired by Take That's "Patience".

PPS. Thank you to Rucy for recommending the perfect book to get me to look at my life from a different perspective. I highly recommend everyone reads Desert Flower, especially if you are interested in the topic of FGM.

Let's get together, yeah yeah yeah and why don't you and I [drink wine]

I love cooking. I may have mentioned this before but just in case I haven't... it is one of my most favourite things to do in the whole wide world! It's such a nice way for me to unwind and relax. I love the chopping, dicing, slicing, stirring and mixing. I love following recipes and creating them. I love making mistakes and figuring out how to fix them. I love realising what spices and herbs go with food item I'm cooking and I love surprising myself when something I made up turned out just right. (And yes, I do despair when I make up something and it's just mank!)

In other parts of the creative world, I don't excel as much - sewing, knitting, crocheting and pottery have all passed me by. So, you might be surprised but I am a novice wood-turner. I did wood-turning for a few terms and it was one of my favourite hobbies. The only reason that I stopped the class was that I had decided to do my TEFL and to move abroad. It was one of the hardest decisions I ever made and the first time that I realised that following your dreams can mean sacrificing things that you love. Whilst the course itself was not expensive it was an entire evening every week dedicated to wood-turning would have cut into my study.

Coming to Korea initially, I let my interest in crafty stuff disappear in the excitement of wandering, travelling, eating and experiencing. However, once winter set in, I found myself craving some crafty time. I am pretty nifty with a scissors and some glue, and on top of being able to draw (and I like to draw), I found myself trying to find ways to while away those long winter hours. So,  I started drawing hands, again. When I took art many moons ago for my Leaving Certificate, my teacher informed us that for our first couple of classes, and for homework, we were just going to draw hands until we could do it perfectly. This exercise is a favourite of mine whenever I come back to drawing after having been away for a while. If I can't draw a hand, I can't draw that elaborate picture I had in my head either! Once I had my hands perfected to my satisfaction (they may not have quite pleased my Art Teacher!), I started to think of ways I could expand my horizons.

Although Korea has a lot of Christmassy ornaments in Daiso and Homeplus (and other shops too), none of them really reminded me of home. My favourite decorations that we have are our little wooden ones that I believe my mam got in Germany many years ago when she was au-pairing there. Over the years, I've started my own collection of ornaments from beautiful glass angels to little wooden decorations. I even seem to be following in my mother's footsteps with a slowly growing collection of nativity scenes.   Thanks to my travels these ornaments are beautiful reminders of trips with family and friends as they hail from America, Italy, Ireland and Scotland. My love of Christmas decorations is so well known by my family and friends, that one year, in a work Kris Kindle, I was absolutely delighted to receive a gorgeous carousel and some glass angels. I was so excited that despite our Kris Kindles supposed to being anonymous, my friend (once more a million thanks, Presc) had to tell me that it was her as I kept telling everyone I met that day thank you! Sadly, I don't have any of these things here with me in Korea. Firstly, I've too many to take on one trip. Secondly, some are too breakable for such a long journey. Thirdly, I don't want to lose them here in Korea.

So back to Christmas in Korea....Daiso and Homeplus didn't have what I was looking for (reminder to self: Maggie you are in KOREA not GERMANY), so after a few minutes of anguish, I decided to make a game plan. I picked out a few things that I liked - some lights, baubles, snowflakes, beads and I got some very thin tinsel (my tree is tiny and I don't like big tinsel in any case). . I am not great at origami so a friend of mine helped me to make some penguins whilst I cut out tons of snowflakes. I like making snowflakes so much that I did this with a lot of my classes last year and I would make about 5 to each of my students one snowflake!. I spent hours folding candy canes, drawing ornaments and researching different advent calendars and  paper decorations. I spent so much time on it that my house for about 3 weeks looked like a stationery shop had exploded with all the paper, glue, stickers, bits and bobs. For the rest, I decided to make my own. A stack of origami paper later I was sitting in my house making old fashioned paper ring chains, Chinese lanterns and these beautiful stars.


That was last year and I saved most of my decorations both bought and homemade (St Joseph disappeared on Christmas day and has not been seen since). This year, I cleared my desk and made it my "Christmas corner". Boxes that held my Christmas presents last year now hold all my decorations, last year's advent calendar is up and pinned with an item a day (and in some cases several items a day). The crafty gifts I got for last year's Christmas are up there waiting their turn to be sewn, glued and/or painted.

Crafty folk

Crafty folk 

Crafty folk

Crafting is so much fun, but it is time consuming and, in my case, very messy for my small space! I struggle with trying to balance the hours of fun that I can have doing it with the state my apartment gets in while I am doing it (and stays in for days after). I struggle with knowing that the minute I start I may not be able to finish before bedtime, so that means I know I'll be up until 1.00a.m. With this in mind, I've tried to create a balance this year: for Easter, I only made these origami Easter bunnies and for Hallowe'en I only spent a few evenings working on my projects. The things I made were easy - bats, ghosts and pumpkins. The more elaborate designs (witch, wizard and crazy killer girl) were still made in a couple of hours. With Christmas approaching and the fact that is is my favourite holiday, I knew I'd be way more easily distracted by crafting. Luckily my friend and I had discussed setting up a Wine and Crafts club a few months before and with this thought in mind the first meeting of this club began on December 5th.  This meant, that not only could I spend some time crafting...I also got to do it in a controlled environment! There were 10 girls at this first event and that meant I just couldn't spread out the way I am wont!  Well, I could...but then I'd have spilt the wine! Despite this curtailment on my space, I still ended up making this gingerbread house with some help from one of the other girls:


So you might think
 I'm mad to have chosen doing TEFL over my beloved Wood-turning. You might think I'm mad to mix wine with crafting and you might think I'm mad to not just buy all the decorations I found in Daiso and Homeplus (some of them are quite nice, btw). Well, the most important concern there is around wine - the worst that can happen is that it spills on a craft. And yes, I could have just bought all the decorations but now I have memories for keeps and plenty of ideas on what to do with my students in afterschool classes and, hopefully, with my own children some day. But yes, I think part of me was mad to give up wood-turning in favour of TEFL. It was one of the hardest decisions I made when I started my journey to move to Korea. However, I can always take it up again and in the meantime, I can see the pieces I made anytime I go home!

PPS This post was inspired by my favourite holiday, Christmas, and my love of crafting.
PPS This post was inspired by the "Let's get together" song from The Parent Trap starring Haley Mills and a great night at Wine and Craft Club. Here's to the next one!
PPPS: No wine was spilt or crafts destroyed in the making of this post.

Now that life has begun.

Imagine a girl, curled up in a big chair in the corner of a room, a laptop sits on her knees and as her fingers glance over the keyboard, her brow furrows in concentration. A question has stumped her - she isn't sure if she understand the grammar point in question.

This is me about a year and a half ago in the midst of the last leg of the journey that has led me to where I am today.Truth be told, the journey of me arriving in Korea and teaching here travels back to the aeons of time and not just to September 2011 when I started studying for my TEFL Qualification. Some of my favourite books as a kid (and beyond, I must admit) were the "Chalet School" Stories by Elinor M Brent Dyer. I loved those books about girls attending a boarding school in Austria and I always had "time to spare" to reread them. I played games in my head where I designed schools, curriculums and imagined teaching my students. Oh, the adventures we had!

As I grew up, my desire to be a teacher did stick with me as my work experience in Secondary School was spent at a local Gaelscoil. However, I hadn't done well in my Leaving Cert so when I finally went to college in 2002, I wasn't 100% sure what I wanted tout of life. I thought (considering my love for books) that maybe I wanted to be a librarian eventually. In truth, I would love to be a librarian or a bookshop owner at some point in my life but reality has a way of kicking you in the bum. Digital is the way most books are going and libraries aren't as popular as they were many moons ago. I remember how, even as a kid, we seemed to be the only kids in our neighbourhood who frequented the several local libraries constantly. Reading just isn't as cool as it once was and with the ever increasing amount of television shows, computer games etc books are fighting what seems to be a losing battle. Even in my own family, I've one brother who came to reading quite late compared to the rest of us ("Harry Potter" reeled him in) and one sister who really doesn't read at all (her favourite book is "Black Beauty" which is the only book she (semi) voluntarily read as a child). However, I worked in the library when I was in college so partly, this dream has been fulfilled. 

Then, I graduated. I started working at a car rental company in the HR department and I realised that teaching was something that I not only enjoyed but was good at. I trained in a lot of work experience / interns and coworkers over the years as well as two people who would go on to manage me. When the time came (after 5+ years) for me to decide what I wanted to do with my life outside of HR (I realised it wasn't something I wanted to do forever), it's probably not surprising that I chose to Teach English as a Foreign Language in Korea.

As I look back on this year, I realise that I have come a long way and I'm so glad that  "[I] let me go...[so that I wasn't] stuck in the same place I've always been". When I arrived I was so nervous. Leaving Ireland had left me emotionally exhausted (see post: I left on a Jet plane ) and I didn't think I'd adjust as easily as I did. I've had an amazing support system from the get-go: a fantastic brother, amazing co-teachers, wonderful friends who have become like family,as well as outstanding family and friends at home...and I've had my determination to make this a memorable experience. Korea (as with any experience) is what you make of it. And for any experience to be a success you have to let go a little and enjoy it, have a bit of determination to stick with it and a desire to actually experience it. In Korea, you have to embrace the culture just a little bit to truly enjoy it here - whether  you start watching K-dramas, listen to K-pop (and not just PSY), or embracing the whole Kimchi Experience. There are tons of things to do and see, people to meet and experiences outside of teaching to be had.

When I first came here, I'd never gone somewhere on a vacation by myself and definitely not to somewhere I'd never been before. Well, I managed to enjoy myself in Korea visiting Seoul museums and spending 5 days alone in Gyeongju (see post: I did survive). I know it's not my favourite way to do things but I learned HOW to do that here. I've learned how to use a smartphone - anyone in my family will tell you when it comes to phones the simpler the better! I've learned a new language and while I am far from proficient I can now use a taxi to get from A to B, I can order my food/drinks and I can understand a few phrases my students throw at me or random strangers ask me. I've learned that acting the eeijit is a completely legit way to entertain children and the sillier you are the funnier they find you. I've learned games are the best way to get kids to practice their vocabulary and that sometimes you need to just drop whatever lesson you had planned and go with the flow. As long as they speak English the main objective has been reached.

Other ways that I have grown are too numerous to count but a few examples are as follows. I've grown more comfortable in my own skin. I am learning how to live by myself, completely - this means doing my own laundry, paying bills on time, waking myself up everyday etc. I only answer to myself. If I forget to pay a bill, the only person that is on is me. When I've lived in accommodation at home, I was responsible for paying bills but only my share. If I were late, someone would always call me or knock on my door. I had stress in my old job but I never pulled something out of thin air before - I have learned to do this consistently in Korea - sometimes a lesson just isn't going the way you want it even if you have the best class in the world. Sometimes, you need to change gear and start doing some thing new to get the kids to focus.

So you might think I'm mad but I feel that I have gotten a lot more out of Korea than I have given to Korea. You might think I'm mad to believe that acting the eeijit is a legitimate way to entertain children and that it's definitely worth it. All, I know is that this has been an incredible year that I wouldn't exchange for the world despite the "usual morning lineup" of my daily life. I no longer need to "wonder when will my life begin". For me the "lights [of opportunity] will [keep] appear[ing]" and I am getting lots of chances to go "out there where they glow".

PS: This post was inspired by a year in Korea
PPS: This post was inspired by the song "When will my life begin" which is sung by Mandy Moore in Tangled. 

Doing a barefoot walk in Daejeon

Lantern Festival, Seoul

Students at Job world

Immersing myself in Korean culture by completing
a puzzle and doing one of the Kimchi poses. 

Seafood in Busan

St Paddy's Day Party, Seoul

There may be a hole in my bucket

Has anyone seen the movie The Bucket List with Jack Nicholson and Morgan Freeman? That movie instilled in me a need to do some of the things I have always wanted to do with my life. In fact, after that movie came out is when I started to mentally tick things off in my head as I got them done: Edinburgh, check! London, check! Paris, check! etc etc. However, despite the fact that this movie came out a long time ago, I've never gotten around to actually doing a bucket list.

I started writing down things just in the last couple of weeks but I've come to the conclusion that I have so many items and, consequently, they will dint a hole if I put them all in just one bucket.

So instead, I made a Korea bucket list (see photo). I only actually wrote these down this week in this design and as you can see by the smiley face some are done already. That was on purpose. I need a little bit of encouragement and noting that a few things are done on my list already is a great incentive. I have 30 things on this list and I hope that I will add some more before too long. (NB-the things that are done already would have been on my list regardless!)

Incidentally, whilst my overall life bucket list isn't even started some things that would have been on it are: sleep in a bed on a train (I got to do this in Vietnam), eat streetfood in every Asian country that I visit (check for Korea and Vietnam), live in a country where I don't speak the language (check for Korea), visit one of the 7 natural wonders of the world (Ha Long Bay, thank you!), go on the Orient express (or at least part of it!) and visit the Pyramids in Egypt (that has been a dream going on 15 or so years so hopefully one day!). Another bucket list item is to visit as many countries as possible in a qualitative sense rather than quantative. Wherever I go, I want to experience as much as possible of the history, culture and food. So, that doesn't mean I can visit 5 countries in 1 week!

I've been reading a lot of online bucket lists and I have noticed that like mine, they tend to be a mix of dreams, aspirations and things that one can definitely do. For the bucket list I have for Korea, I would say my biggest dream/aspiration is to visit 4 other Asian countries, go to Jeju Island and do the Hot Air Balloon Ride. The ones that I can definitely do: visit all 5 palaces and eat the dakgalbi in Chuncheon as well as the more mundane (but no less important to me) such as kite flying, snowman building and learning Korean.

So, you might think I'm mad to have decided to do a bucket list that is really only aimed at Korea. So, you might think I'm mad to limit myself to only 4 Asian countries when the world is my oyster. You might be right.

However, I am LIVING in Korea and I would like to know that when I come back to Ireland that if people asked me what Korea is like I would be able to tell them something of the culture, the history, the food. That when I go back I would be able to tell people that such and such sight in Korea is amazing and you don't want to miss it even if it isn't in any guide book! I would like to be able to go home and say to people that I learned something about each place I visited's culture and history. I don't want to spend my time whirling around from place to place and coming away exhausted, confused and not remembering whether something was in Vietnam, Japan or China!

PS. This post was inspired by the song "There's a hole in my bucket, dear Liza"  and the movie The Bucket List.

PPS. Please note that 11 in the photo only has 3 countries listed (Vietnam, Thailand and Laos) out of the 4  because I've yet to decide what other country I would like to visit.

PPS I can knock Busan off my list and taking the KTX...however, I do want to take the KTX whilst awake - passed out on my way home from Busan.

Outcasts and girls with ambition (and my eyebrows) that's what I wanna see

Years ago, when Mlle Awesome was not even a full day old, my father took us to the hospital to meet her. My mother took one look at me and demanded to know what I had done to my face. My father and siblings stared at me bemused ..that is until my mother pointed out that I had shaved off half my right eyebrow.  Literally. I remember, that at this age I hated my bushy eyebrows but I couldn't figure out how other girls and women got their eyebrows to look so nice. I knew that razors removed hair ...so, voila! I had removed half of mine before getting cold feet and was easily reassured that there was no difference when my family didn't seem to notice.

Nowadays, I have long since gone through life not really caring about my eyebrows. Ever so often I will look at them, smooth them out and, even occassionally, lament their bushiness. When this happens, most of the time I do nothing to try and fix them. I have let my sister pluck my eyebrows before - she got one hair out and I decided plucking was not for me. Another time, just before my sister's wedding, we were at a beautician who couldn't believe we would't want anything done with our eyebrows...and she proceeded to "shape" them despite our protests. I am not very girly when it comes to make up and getting manicures, massages etc. I have had my nails done a few times, and I have enjoyed getting them done, but I have never thought of going by myself to get it done - I've always ended up going because a friend was going. I don't wear make up on a daily basis because that means getting up earlier - I just about wake up as it is!
Despite my normal lack of grooming, I have recently dabbled in some ...and only because of the challenge of stepping outside my normal comfortzone.
Whilst my mother has (correctly) pointed out this really isn't that much of a challenge - it's not like I ran a marathon! However, it was a small step out of my comfortable existence and ..it did involve pain! Rest easy folks, this is not a tale of a Brazilian wax......so, read on!
One of my friends has her sister visiting her at the moment and last week we were all at dinner together at another friends apartments. After dinner, our host sat down with her head lying back on her bed whilst the sister sat over her, pulled out some thread and began threading our hosts eyebrows. This girl was squeezing my hand, tears running down her face as she whimpered little mewls of pain. After she braved her way through this, another girl decided to try it. She was much more stoic but I sat in shock as both she and our host suggested that I get my eyebrows threaded. After protesting, and jokingly threatening to lock myself in the bathroom rather than do that, I proceeded to explain that I could not understand volutarily inflicting cosmetic pain on myself.
However, I was dared, challenged to at least get the middle bit between my eyebrows done. As I debated, my friend, whose sister was doing the threading, was recounting horror stories of her own about threading. Accepting the challenge I leaned back and was pleasantly surprised that the middle bit was not painful -  a little twinge sure, but nothing I couldn't handle. Thinking this would be a piece of cake after a few mintues of recovery decided to get my eyebrows done as well. I won't lie, my eyebrows were waaay more painful than that middle part but overall it wasn't as painful as I thought it would be as I only had tears running down my face and managed to survive without any whimpering!
Would I do it again? Probably not! I don't like having to do that maintenance. Would I recommend anyone to get it done? Definitely not! You can try it if you want but I will not be the person you point the finger of blame at so you can say "She told me to do it!" I believe in low-key maintenance. I realise as I get older this may be a problem. However, despite the fact I don't wear make up and  have no interest in consistent grooming, I have been told that I don't look much older than 25. Considering I'm now 30, I consider this quite an achievement . As Pink says " I'm so glad that I'll never fit in. That will never be me". I'm not and will never be one of those girls obsessed with make up, clothes and consistently looking good. When I go out, I make an effort but on a daily basis I prefer to present my actual self to the world. What you see is pretty much what you get. This may be the wrong attitude but I won't deny what I look like, warts and all.

Here in Korea, I got my photo taken for my visa for when I go on vacation. I don't look like me because here they airbrush your photos. I look as if I am wearing make up and that I have flawless skin. It looks like me but reminds me of the first time I wore make up which was when I was in college and one of my friends did my face for me. I was out at Rileys (the only club in town) and as I walked past a mirror I thought to myself "Wow, that girl is wearing the exact samething as me!" only to realise that was me. On closer inspection she looked like me but at the same time...not.

So you might think I'm mad that I prefer to be a girl who isn't into make up or grooming. (And, let us be clear, I am not judging anyone who is ... that is for them to decide) I much prefer to spend the time that I have doing something way more worthwhile..........sleeping! On a more serious note, this post was inspired by Pink's song "Stupid Girls" and I do believe that a trend has started where overall there is a lot more focus on how a girl looks rather than how she behaves. I need look no further than Korea - there is such an obsession with youth and beauty here that I fear that "outcasts and girls with ambition" will fall by the wayside. You don't need to be like me and not wear make up to be ambitious but it shouldn't be the only thing you are ambitious in. These days there is too much focus on looks, celebrity and that ever elusive 15 miutes of fame. I don't, and have never wanted, to be the next president or CEO...but we need people who do want this (boys  and girls alike). The only way we can achieve this is if we move away from this stupid encouragement of all things celebrity. Not everyone can be famous, not everyone can be president and, more importantly, not everyone should even attempt to do this. I used to like shows like America's got Talent or the Xfactor (British version) until I realised that they promote the vacuousness that is so prevalent in our cultures today. Where are the outcasts, the girls with ambition, the people who want to change the world, even just their tiny little bit of it? That's what I want to see.